Some kids dream of being an astronaut...Some kids dream of becoming president, or being a fireman, or a police officer... dreamed of having a tail. Not like a happy, wiggly, puppy tail - but a flexible, versatile and completely controllable limb extending from just above my butt. It's not that I never dreamed of being a firefighter or a police officer, its just that in my dream - I got to save an extra baby, or carry an extra gun...With all the recent developments in technology I decided to find out the chances of the seeds of that childhood dream growing into fruition. Before I got myself into the tail generation, I decided to turn to science to learn about limb regeneration...Salamanders can regrow limbs over and over again... Why can't I grow back a finger? Well it turns out, I can! To be honest, I don't know for sure if I can (and I decided to skip that experiment), but one man did!
Lee Speivak, a humble hobby shop owner, was explaining the safety hazards of model aeroplanes... Lee happened have an overwhelming hunger to get his point across one day and decided to chop the end of his finger clean off to prove a point. When he couldn't find his severed phalanx, the Doctors suggested a skin graft and investing in a pair of gloves to hide the scars from the mishap. Lee's brother had another idea and it was the most bizarre combination of ancient witch-doctory and modern day sci-fi. So what was Lee's magical idea? Well, theres a long version and a short version... I will provide the short version, because I'm not versed in Sci-fi, or witch-doctory type things... 'Grind up some pigs bladder and sprinkle it on the cut.' -PPBLPBSPSBPSLLL!!!! SHA! That totally seems legitimate... WELL TURNS OUT IT IS!!!!
CHECK IT OUT!!!!
So if we can regrow what we've already have, can we grow a completely new limb?
After hours and hours of research (googling 'growing a tail' and reading through numerous peoples attempts to make light of what I feel is a legitimate scientific question) I have discovered to my chagrin, that growing a tail from scratch, as an adult, would be near impossible with meditation alone. However, I did discover, that in our DNA is the same code that a mouse has to grow his tail - the difference, our code is not activated in the early embryonic stage of our development when our limbs began to grow and take shape - or in my own terms - The tail button is not pressed when we are in our mommy's tummy. If we can alter the genetic code to activate that part of our DNA - viola! one tail... Now whether it is a mouse tail or not, I do not know... a mouse tail would be virtually useless for me, as it would be barely long enough to check my back pocket with. The other solution would be to transplant a tail from another species. The issue that arrives there is teaching the brain to work a completely new limb should the body decide not to reject the tail altogether (maybe sprinkle a lil' pig's bladder on it). So there it is so far, a tail may not be in my future - but science seems to be advancing technically and regressing maturity-wise, quickly enough that soon all the children may be able to get designer tails and lizard's tongues and all the cool stuff that kids (and some of us cartoon-loving big kids) have been dreaming about...
So to all the mom's that said growing a tail was a bunch of hogwash...maybe you're not too far off.
CHECK IT OUT!!!!
So if we can regrow what we've already have, can we grow a completely new limb?
After hours and hours of research (googling 'growing a tail' and reading through numerous peoples attempts to make light of what I feel is a legitimate scientific question) I have discovered to my chagrin, that growing a tail from scratch, as an adult, would be near impossible with meditation alone. However, I did discover, that in our DNA is the same code that a mouse has to grow his tail - the difference, our code is not activated in the early embryonic stage of our development when our limbs began to grow and take shape - or in my own terms - The tail button is not pressed when we are in our mommy's tummy. If we can alter the genetic code to activate that part of our DNA - viola! one tail... Now whether it is a mouse tail or not, I do not know... a mouse tail would be virtually useless for me, as it would be barely long enough to check my back pocket with. The other solution would be to transplant a tail from another species. The issue that arrives there is teaching the brain to work a completely new limb should the body decide not to reject the tail altogether (maybe sprinkle a lil' pig's bladder on it). So there it is so far, a tail may not be in my future - but science seems to be advancing technically and regressing maturity-wise, quickly enough that soon all the children may be able to get designer tails and lizard's tongues and all the cool stuff that kids (and some of us cartoon-loving big kids) have been dreaming about...
So to all the mom's that said growing a tail was a bunch of hogwash...maybe you're not too far off.
Sir, what about Jamie Lee Curtis?
ReplyDeleteI don't think he can grow one of her.
ReplyDeleteA prehensile man wanting a prehensile tail. It's a bit prehensile of you.
ReplyDelete